Divorce isn’t easy. It can feel daunting, stressful and at times, scary. Your whole life is suddenly turned on its head, and you find yourself filled with uncertainties about the future.
It’s not uncommon to worry about what life will look like after divorce. In fact, marriage counselling statistics found that most people stay in a marriage for around 5 years after they’ve decided that it’s unsalvageable.
This week, we’re taking a look at four of the most common fears you might have if you’re going through, or contemplating, a divorce.
Financial worries
What your financial future will look like once you’re separated is bound to be a source of worry. Will your standard of living be the same? How much money (if any) will your spouse be obliged to pay you after the divorce? If you don’t work now, will you need to find employment?
Though not everyone has the same financial situation, the fears experienced are likely to be similar, particularly when it comes to having financial security in the future. There can be a lot of uncertainty on both sides.
Split social circles – family and friends
Being part of a couple often means sharing mutual friends and having social relationships with one another’s families. So it’s only natural that you might be worried about how those social circles will work following a divorce.
Will sides be chosen? Will your friends and in-laws treat you differently? Will your children still play together with theirs? The truth is that it could go either way. For some, not much will change, whereas for others some relationships won’t be so easy to maintain after a separation.
Losing those relationships can be hard. Not just on an emotional level, but a practical level too. It’s important to look after yourself emotionally, to ensure that you’ve got the strength to navigate whatever path you take following your divorce.
How will the kids cope?
How the children will be impacted on both a practical and emotional level is a very common fear for divorcing couples. Who will they live with? Will they need to change schools? How will this affect them in the longer term?
Divorce can affect children in a lot of different ways. They’re going through as much disruption and change as their parents, which is why communicating with them is so important. Reassuring them that it’s not their fault, being transparent about what’s going to change, and always putting them first, no matter what.
It’s also helpful to remember that you’ve decided to divorce because it’s the best thing for the family as a whole. Staying together ‘for the kids’ can lead to its own kind of tension and upset, and potentially give them a bad example of what a healthy marriage should look like.
Facing the unknown
Change isn’t an easy thing to deal with, especially the changes that come with a divorce. As people, we get comfortable in our routines, we like to know what’s coming next. In the face of divorce, everything becomes much more uncertain.
From where you’ll live, to what your social life will look like, even the mundane routines like who cooks the dinner and who puts the kids to bed – there’s the potential for it all to look different. That’s why it’s always better to have an expert on your side to help the transition.
At Harrogate Family Law, we work with our clients to secure a future they’ll be happy and comfortable with.
You’re not alone. Get in touch with us today to find out how we can help.
