How can you tell the difference between dissatisfaction during a particularly tricky time in your relationship and being ready for divorce? Every marriage has its ups and downs but there are some things that indicate it’s time to move on.
You notice passive aggression
Loss of respect for your partner can lead to one or both of you undermining the other without ever having a proper conversation about the problems in your relationship. The likelihood is that you both know the marriage isn’t working but neither of you wants to express it directly. Instead, you skirt around the issue, being unhelpful or subtly critical to make the point that you are not happy.
You are prepared for change
Divorce will bring significant changes to almost every aspect of your life, touching family and friends and having an impact on your home and finances. If you are truly ready for divorce you won’t be deterred by the practical and emotional upheaval that lies ahead.
There is less physical intimacy
One clear sign that your relationship is in trouble is a lack of intimacy. All marriages have their low points and there are things you can try to reignite the desire, such as regular date nights. However, if you no longer feel attracted to your spouse or don’t feel the same empathy for them that you once did, your relationship may have run its course.
You spend less time together
Couples often deal with problems in their marriage by avoiding conflict and one common way of doing this is to work late or spend more time away from home. If you find yourself coming up with excuses to keep you away, think about the reasons for your behaviour and whether there are issues you need to confront.
You have tried to fix things
Divorce is a big step for you and your family, so it makes sense to try and improve your relationship first. Counselling may help if you are both committed to making things work. If you have tried to resolve your issues and still feel the same, it may be a sign you are ready to go your separate ways.
You think about divorce even when you are not arguing
In the heat of an argument, many couples say they want a divorce – and believe it – but these strong feelings usually dissipate when things calm down. If you find yourself wanting a divorce even when you and your spouse are not fighting, it’s probably time to have that conversation.
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Carol Jessop is an experienced family lawyer specialising in finding practical solutions to resolve complex financial arrangements, protecting assets and obtaining emergency orders to provide personal protection or prevent the removal of children.
Carol has over 30 years’ experience in family law and is recognised by her clients and peers as highly knowledgeable and compassionate.
Everyone’s circumstances are different and this article is provided by way of general information only and must not be relied upon. If you require legal advice on a family law issue, please feel free to contact us by emailing firstname.lastname@example.org.